work or travel?

sometimes i question myself. is this what i want? i really don't know (yet). i don't love or hate my job. some days, its very laid back, some other days, its absolutely retarded busy i don't even have time to eat or a quick pit stop to the loo (i'm not joking,*pulls serious face*). probably some of u might notice my absence on msn. i hate work and freaking tight deadlines. but i love design. how? thats like the only thing i know/capable of doing. what other alternatives do i have? some friends advice me to try up new lines like marketing or sales. that is something new and totally different from what i am doing at the moment. the risk is still there. the thoughts of leaving everything aside, and go travel the world while i'm still young came across my mind more than one occasion. but what am i gonna do for a living? picking strawberries and washing dishes? thats not exactly what i have in mind tho. its hard to juggle bits and pieces of what we love to do. tough shits right? :P still planning in my head, what are the alternatives i have. well, i can say not much. its still tough shit if i leave this field. its like starting from zero. it is too if i leave to travel around the world and come back with rich culture but poor bank account. :P not very wise now calvin. nah uh. hahaha :P but then, we only live once, why am i holding myself back? :s
i hate my inner-self telling me to not to pull off any risky thoughts. but life is random right? we never know what will bring us unless we have tried with all our might. time is ticking and i hate the feeling of insecurity in my life right now. i'm neither young nor old, but in the end, i just have to decide. just one final decision. why is it so fcking hard to decide.

anyways, i'm leaving to cambodia this saturday. will return with a bundle of photos. i promise.

till then, i wish everyone a happy long weekend and raya!!


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