i'm lost in myself again. i want to wasureru kedo muri. i want to say ikanaide kedo muri. kimino seide fuan da...kimino seide shiawasedatta...kimino seide i'm lost...so lost. i want to escape this feeling kedo muri. shinyoshite i tell myself but can i really? mainichi i try to learn as much nihon go so i can have conversations with u. kedo mada mada...
where should i go from here...dokoni ikuno?
what should i do from now...dousiyou?

this morning, out of randomness, i was at friend's place and weighted myself. it was shocking because i lost 6kgs since i last came here. at 48kg now, i'm no where near a healthy weight. no way.
one of my friends said that i worried too much about life. in other words, stressed. am i really so stressed out about life? from an outsider, they probably tell me that i'm a happy go lucky don't care about anything and live life to the fullest but am i really?

i want to be happy again.
will i be happy again?
is it really over?

i am lost in the middle of nowhere. in the middle of no where, will i find myself again?

i can only hope and do my best.