the truth is, i have been emo-ing for quite some time now. i guess love is a short lived thing. may be what they said about what happens in vegas stays in vegas is true. in my case, it's nz. i have no news what so ever about my gf for more than 1 month. and the latest email from her was she saying she was so busy she have no time to pick up my calls. 24 hours a day and really no time? or may be it is an unspoken rule for japanese hinting a break up? honestly, i've been quite numb. i tried to give thousand of reasons that she could be super busy. (the fact that she is on a snowboarding holiday in hokkaido while doing some part time job as well) may be i should stop giving her benefit of a doubt.

the truth is i miss her like hell. life goes on aight? my life is not always happening. the best time of my life is short lived. can i put this all behind me and pretend it was nothing but a mere delusion. i was happy. i was more than just happy. i thought i finally have love. or so i thought.

thank you for showing me what love feels like. to live it and truly breathe it.